America’s favorite pasttime…

Boston Red Sox

Image by Keith Allison via Flickr

As I sit here watching the Red Sox/Rangers game (yes, I am a huge BoSox fan), I can’t help but think about the impact that sports have had on my life.  I have played sports for as long as I can remember.  Essentially straight from the womb.  Softball and basketball consumed my life when I was a kid.  But today, as I get older, softball has become the mainstay.  It’s a lot more fun to be out on a field having fun, drinking a beer in between innings, than running up and down a court drenched in sweat.  Okay, maybe it’s just because I’m lazier than I used to be.  But I still try to convince myself that it is because I was always better at softball.  

Softball has always been the best escape for me.  My happy place if you will.  I love the smell of freshly mowed grass mixed with just a little bit of that earthy dirt smell.  And nothing can ever compete with the smell of a new glove, as weird as that may sound.  I have enjoyed being out on the field from the time I could walk.  There is just something about it that will always get to me. 

Now, if I were to be honest with myself, I would admit that softball has always been one of the only things that I felt good at.  It has always been the one thing that I knew I could do right.   My emotions can betray me.  My thoughts race endlessly.  I battle raging anger that sometimes can’t be stopped.  And I suffer through severe depression that makes me think that I will not make it to tomorrow.  And none of those things I feel any control over, as much as I try to.  But softball?  I can do that.  I can be there on that field surrounded by other lovers of the game and know that I belong.  At least for the one hour that I’m there, I am “normal” by anyone’s standards.  And that, to me, feels as close to ordinary as I may ever get.

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